Friday, May 29, 2009

Simple Things in Life

Sometimes I am amazed by life. Last night I found myself very unhappy and frustrated and just almost mad, more disappointed then anything, and not really at anyone but myself. I hate those moments. However, they do just hit you at times and you have to choose what to do with them. For me I chose to get my * up and work out and get over it already. Some situations I am learning I just can't do anything about, no matter how hard I try. Realizing that is okay is wonderful!
Today I find myself feeling very blessed. I think I have the best job in the world. While it is not always glamorous, it is so rewarding. It is a job so many of us pass over though.
Two years ago I moved back to Texas and decided to try and find a way to be happy and have my children in my life. I got the first job that I could- working at Chick Fil A. Mainly because I was missing my mother in law terribly and she loved the place. Then also because I was guaranteed certain hours, could work around the kids schedule and always had Sundays off.
One day this man walks in with his wife and I instantly knew that she was in the middle stages of Alzheimer's. We got to know each other mainly because he was funny and thought I was all of 16. As if... he was floored to find out this beautiful female- as he would restate the moment, had three children and was in her 30's. To this day he still just can't believe it.
We got to know each other as they ate at CFA mon-fri for lunch, always ordering the same thing. The love I saw was amazing. He always helped her in the door, helped her with her food. I think my admiration for the moment really helped us become friends. It was a blessing for him too as I had taken care of my mother in law until her passing from Alzheimer's and Congestive Heart Failure.
I am very "old school", "traditional", whatever you would like to call it. I truly believe family should care for family if at all possible. I was able to help him with her. I quit the job over the summer when my grandfather passed away. I realized from his passing that I was not achieving my true calling and wanted more out of life. Wanted to make him happy.
I got a call right around Thanksgiving from this husband. He let me know that his wife had fallen and was bedridden and he wanted me to come out and see what I thought.
I did just that, that day in fact. I am not one to waist time. (not always a good thing mind you)
When I saw her she instantly smiled and I knew this was the job I wanted. One and a half years later I look back with no regrets.
I do have to change her when I first get to their house in the mornings, not always pleasant either. However every morning when I come in my day starts with Sunshine. I guess I bring that with me because she smiles and laughs and just instantly perks up.
With patients like this, that is not very typical. They usually don't remember "new" people and rarely even remember their children and spouse. She knows me though, personally I think more by spirit then by actual being...
I get so much affirmation from her. Every day she has something kind to say. It is wonderful. Today I was washing her hair, which is an ordeal. She is in a hospital bed and I have to pull a feeding tray over, slide a stretcher under the mattress across the feeding tray- then prop a pillow. Carefully maneuver her legs across. Walk around to the other side, pull her with my strength so that her head is off the bed, prop her head as I use a salad like bowl which is propped on a bar stool, and use a small drinking cup to then wash her hair. It is a workout. I wouldn't change a thing though because she loves it.
Today I was helping her back into the bed correctly and leaned across to grab something and she kissed the side of my face and said, "I love you."
Those are the golden moments in life. Where we give of ourselves fully and completely and they make a difference in someone else's life. It is a moment that no one can ever take from me and one that I will treasure among many many others with Anne.

So today I just really appreciate how truly blessed I am. I don't' know how much longer I will care for Anne, I don't have an idea of how many days she will remain on this earth but I do know that if at all possible like my mother in law Joyce, I will stick it out until the end. To give is so much more rewarding then to receive...a lesson I am so thankful I have learned.

Wednesday, May 27, 2009

Thankful Thursday

I am thankful this week that school is coming to a close tomorrow. We have a half day and it is all over.

I am thankful that our garden is doing well. We even have some green tomatoes now. I ate what was left of the radishes, and had 2 blueberries and one raspberry. mmmm

Thankful that someone, meaning one of the boys will help cut the chickens wings next time. Maybe I am more city girl then I realized.

Thankful that camp for the younger two is paid for and is coming up soon.

Thankful for friends and family. I have had a pretty rough week, just fighting depression that is never ending, but understandable.

Thankful for old friends that I have connected with over the last couple weeks. It is so nice to know how people we once loved are doing and all that jazz

On that note...My prayer is to visit family in August, but we shall see what the Lord decides. It will take lots of quilt sales to pay the ticket to fly there.

Monday, May 25, 2009

Menu Monday

Wow this week will be so quick, so complicated and we will need to remember this bible verse this week I think.

My dear brothers, take note of this: Everyone should be quick to listen, slow to speak and slow to become angry,”- James 1:19
As for my menu
BBQ- what else on a wonderful day everyone has off
Breakfast night- French toast and fresh fruit
Tostadas with lettuce salad
Hamburgers and Hotdogs
Spaghetti and Garlic Bread
On your Own
I must admit I am ever so thankful for this week to be over before it has begun. It will be long and emotional as they conclude this school year. I am very very proud of all of them and their achievements this year. I pray for our summer and that we make the best of the short time they are home. That we learn some new skills, like soap making, canning foods, dehydrating foods, piano etc. Most of all just enjoy time together.

Wednesday, May 20, 2009

Quilt Sold on Etsy

Today has been a day of blessings. My cousin and his wife purchased a Baby Genius Quilt from me. I will hopefully get it made this weekend. I met with her earlier today and she gave me the check. I needed the money for the kids church camp tomorrow, as the full amount is due.

I had no idea she was also making a contribution to their camp. I was blown away by their thoughtfulness when I got home this afternoon, after a very long day, and saw the amount on this check.
What is even more wonderful is I sold a Panel quilt at school today. I even had change for the ladies $100 bill which is all she had because I had my cash box money from the carnival on me still. I was running late and did not have time to stop between work and meeting my cousins wife. YEAH GOD! Late can be so good at times. My kids can give this lady her quilt tomorrow through her daughter at their school.

Then Tonight my dear friend Des listed a treasury with one of my panel quilts in it. It led someone to see the Noahs Ark Quilt I had listed. This woman that purchased the quilt said she had made one for her son a few years ago and it has since fallen apart and she wanted a new one but had not had any luck. Now my vision that I created for my company has come true for this family. I am bringing SUNSHINE into their home. What a wonderful Ministry I truly have. I love when the Lord just works all the small details out. It was not even a "Sale" Quilt so wow, great news.

I also took an order for a Baby Quilt today, I will get payment upon receipt, mainly because it takes a little pressure off me considering I already have one baby quilt to make. Then this week I have a request for one Tshirt quilt, and two Twin size bed quilts. Those details are still being worked out.

I did get a request for a King Size Bed quilt for my Dad in Utah's wife but I declined. I don't feel my quilts are quite good enough for that yet. But I do hope in a few years I can do one as a gift.

I have been so blessed this week.

I also found today a new skill. I may not do them exactly right but I figured out how to make a pillowcase style dress. Mine was with some scrap fabric because I do not have any white pillowcases and I didn't even have any Muslin- weird, so I found some scrap girl dress material from a Handprint Quilt I made. I love that I figured it out. It may not be perfect but I am betting it will fit my little cousin so well, she is 5 months. I always want to call her my niece though, as her mom is so much more a sister to me then my cousin's wife. I can't wait to share this new dress with her. It will be very cute over a little onesie in the summer here. :-)

Thank you Lord for all the wonderful bounty you have bestowed unto us this week, for your continued blessing and the fulfillment's of the desires in my heart. Also for your wonderful friendship that comes through your servants, my friends, I don't know what I would have done without that this week. I am ever so grateful and humbled by your grace.


Wednesday, May 13, 2009

Exhaustion and Psalms

Sleep- sometimes when I see our children asleep it reminds me so much of Psalms 23. I think mainly because in a few of these instances. They do not intend to be asleep they are merely out due to exhaustion. God grants them deep rest during these time. I think often we try to cram so much into our days and it leads to this sense of exhaustion. I know sometimes I am in weeks of walking exhaustion like now where I just can't get a good nights sleep and feel refreshed so I am praying that the Lord walk me by some still waters and restore my soul tonight so that I may feel renewed in Him.

1 The LORD is my shepherd, I shall not be in want.
2 He makes me lie down in green pastures,
he leads me beside quiet waters,

3 he restores my soul.
He guides me in paths of righteousness
for his name's sake.

4 Even though I walk
through the valley of the shadow of death, [a]
I will fear no evil,
for you are with me;
your rod and your staff,
they comfort me.

5 You prepare a table before me
in the presence of my enemies.
You anoint my head with oil;
my cup overflows.

6 Surely goodness and love will follow me
all the days of my life,
and I will dwell in the house of the LORD

Tuesday, May 12, 2009

Tackle it Tuesday

I am trying to finish a quilt today. Will require a lot of work. Psalm 118:14 The Lord is my strength and my song, he is my salvation. Philippians 4:13 I can do everything through him who gives me strength. Isaiah 64:8 Yet, O LORD, you are our Father. We are the clay, you are the potter; we are all the work of your hand.

Monday, May 11, 2009

Menu Monday

This week dinner is very easy. Our church is hosting a 5 days of Beans and Rice and Tap Water. For 5 days help raise awareness and compassion for the billions of people who daily experience hunger and thirst. Be the Message- they have a site, if you are interested. Now I will be honest in that I health wise would not make it on just plain beans and rice so I will add a couple things to the beans. The kids might even have rice with milk.
On Saturday and Sunday they will take a special Missions offering. They are asking that we donate the money saved on groceries to this special effort.
I think it is a great lesson. While I agree with the idea my children will still eat their free breakfast and lunch at school. But at home for dinner all week, the whole family will participate in nothing but beans, rice and tap water.
Will be interesting to see how God works in all of us through this.

Thursday, May 7, 2009

Thankful Thursday

I tend to read a Blog quite frequently called Following 31 today she talked about how we are to talk about motherhood- whether it be us as a mom, our own mothers, or another mother that we know. Now to be honest, I have been keeping up with my Thankful Thursday Postings, but I have not been good about linking back and Rita's is probably the only one I read every week.
I love her blog because I try so hard to be that Proverbs 31 woman. My mother in law and I once had a deep conversation about the bible passage because I was utterly depressed over my perception on my failed job at being a good wife and mother. I could not seem to stay organized, keep a clean house, always have dinner on the table and STOP CRYING. I felt that I was not having enough Faith.
You know she corrected me in a heartbeat. She reminded me about story time every day, how I held my kids, how I played with them outside. How I mowed the lawn during their naptime once a week so that when my husband was home from his 50+ hour week he could spend more time with his kids and wife then have to be out there mowing the lawn, even miscarried a child due to mowing the lawn. I did not know I was pregnant and honestly my body was not prepared for another child, I had just had Mekenzei a few months earlier in May, it was December, and her and Zekaryah were only 15 months apart.
It made me realize how I missed the mark on what it meant to be a Proverbs 31 woman. Yes it is nice to have a clean house but it is much better to have spent the day having a picnic on the floor in the living room, reading a story to my attention driven child or managing a chore for my husband so that he had one less thing to do and could spend more time with us instead.
I look back to 15+ years ago. I had just started college, had no desire to have children of my own, wanted a career in teaching and music and honestly didn't really care much about marriage either.
Funny how the Lord can place someone in your life to have you follow HIS PLAN, and not yours isn't it?
I have three living children who are each beautiful and challenging in their own ways. I have a daughter which when I started having kids I only wanted boys, and four of them once we had Zekaryah, before that I was very content just having Jakob, he was our perfect child. Slept through the night, rarely fussy, loved to be sung to, read to just everything you could want. For the most part it has remained the same. I think the Lord knew we needed more COLOR in our lives because we got Mekenzei and Zekaryah who sing their own tune and I love them both for it all the time, even if it can be frustrating.
I never did finish my teaching degree. I was five classes from my B.A., after much stress to my marriage over constantly trying to go back to school. I asked the Lord to remove the desire from my heart. You know HE DID. I do still love to teach but it doesn't follow me around in the area of REGRET anymore. That was a burden I wanted to lay down at Christs Feet and LEAVE THERE.
I have tried to work off and on and always find myself utterly depressed so currently I work a few hours a week and then quilt trying to make extra money from items I make. I find this very rewarding. And truth be told some teaching has come from it. I have taught a friend how to quilt, just a few minor things, and have had someone request that this summer I teach her and her mother how to quilt. I can't do fancy quilting, but I am honored that they think my work is good enough to learn from.
So while I may not have a clean house- EVER, I would say that my kids are emotionally and spiritually fed and that I meet my husbands needs the best that I can, so while I may not get every area of Proverbs 31 with a Gold Star I still strive to be that 31 Godly Woman.
See Ritas Following 31 today, it is very inspirational.

Wednesday, May 6, 2009

Wordless Wednesday

1 Strawberry Plant out of many. May our Garden continue to be Blessed by Our Heavenly Father, we give him Thanks for Providing food for our table. May it overflow with nourishment.

Tuesday, May 5, 2009

Tackle it Tuesday

Well I got nothing done today, no housework or sewing that is. I drove the kids to school got two movies on the way home and laid back in my bed. My head has been ever so painful today. I was so tired cause I fell asleep during the first movie, I kept tying to stay awake and finally just gave in. Slept for a couple hours, finished my movie, started the second movie, then drove to the school to attend the PTO meeting where I am secretary, took notes and left. Then took Jakob into town 30 min away to get shoes, met my husband there so he could pay for both boys shoes- one I can still pick out without him being there. Then he took our son and I drove home, stopped to get an Iced Tea hoping it would help my head. No dice.
So now I lay in my almost dark room wanting terribly to go to sleep, realizing I can't do that because dinner has yet to be served and everyone is still outside doing their own thing.
So maybe my tackle it tue was just replacing shoes for the boys, or maybe it was taking a day for myself but not my normal work load Tue that is for sure.
I am ever so grateful to Des today who sent me some wonderful bible verses- I have been fighting depression the last three days I guess and they were a reminder that I need to rely on God and this too will pass.

Monday, May 4, 2009

Menu Monday

This week we are going with an Italian Theme, mainly because I think the kids are tired of beans. Italian can still be cheap too.
Handmade Make your own Pizza
Spaghetti, French Bread, Green Beans
Chicken Breast with Spag and Sauce (or just the breast for Jakob) with pasta

Mekenzei's Birthday dinner- Requested Taco Salad and Queso with Chips<>
On Your Own

Hamburgers and hotdogs/sausage