Tuesday, October 13, 2009

A Clean Heart and Desire

Today I feel so encouraged by our Heavenly Father. Yesterday was an amazing day as I patiently went through so many pages online for coupons and such to help stretch the money the Lord has provided for us to meet our needs. I felt unbelievably blessed as sales poured in for burp cloths. A teacher, who shall remain nameless, happened to think of me- she said and went to my site and found the burp cloths online. She purchased a few and wrote to let me know she also needed some boy burp rags too. I sent her the link to some I had online that she had missed. Meanwhile we headed to the store in search for these Dogs for my son's project on Call of the Wild. I was in a little dismay as I saw the price was $15 and some change (with tax), however I remembered the blessing of the burp rags and realized - He already knew that we would NEED these and already knew the cost.

I came back home to find that indeed she not only wanted the burp rags online but three more that I could make for her. What a true blessings and testament that our Heavenly Father provides a way when we can see none before us.

I then noticed a conversation on my ETSY account for one of my Baby Genius Quilts. I have responded to the question of the price and am awaiting to hear if the person would still like to purchase this quilt.

Meanwhile, today I went to the school to help count cookie dough. Honestly when I woke up this morning everything inside me said to not go because my head was pounding. The Lord once again had a plan. Another volunteer, also to be nameless, was asking a question about subbing and how to fill out the paperwork. While a mutual friend looked this info up for her, she noticed a Job opening. To be honest by heart screamed with desire when I thought of subbing. It is something that I truly would love to do. I have prayed that the Lord would soften my husbands heart toward me teaching. Today after nearly 15 years, he opened up those gateways for me.

I am happy to say that I have applied for the position of ESL Teacher Aide at our local school. I am not sure if I will get the job but I am sure that if the Lord has this in his path for me at this time, then he will continue to make a way. It was encouraging to me as this fellow parent passed on this job in order to give me the opportunity. She said, let Mrs Wells apply for this, she needs it more than I do right now. How awesome, to have support among fellow women I work beside in the PTO.

I am saddened often throughout the day as I miss Anne dearly. I am unsure if the Lord will call her home soon. I do pray that he would, as her life here is finished. She provided me so much healing over the death and separation of my mother in law. The guilt that I had over a job that I felt I did not fully do 100% all the time. I came to realize that my heart had its best intent with both jobs. That the Lord used me in both cases to provide some spiritual light to them. Some sunshine... as I like to see it. It was an honor to care for both women and I would be more than grateful if it is now time to open the doors to teach. A job that would truly work well alongside the schedules of my children. Then one day if it is the Lords Will, I might finish out my degree and become a full time teacher. If not I will be content with what He provides for my path.

I think we have many talents in life and I am so blessed to be able to use the variety He has given to me through the last few years. I am also so grateful for the loss of this job. I feel my family is closer than ever. We have been reminded to rely on Him more completely and get to the basics again. I researched some bible verses today, that really spoke to my heart. Which I find has been renewed this week. It is truly wonderful to see Him grant the desires of my heart!

(Psalms 37:4-6 NKJV) Delight yourself also in the LORD, And He shall give you the desires of your heart. {5} Commit your way to the LORD, Trust also in Him, And He shall bring it to pass. {6} He shall bring forth your righteousness as the light, And your justice as the noonday.

Create in me a clean heart, O God. Renew a right spirit within me. (Psalm 51:10)

Ezekiel 36:26 . . . I will give you a new heart with new and right desires, and I will put a new spirit in you. I will take out your stony heart of sin and give you a new, obedient heart.

Ephesians 3:17 . . . I pray that Christ will be more and more at home in your hearts as you trust in him. May your roots go down deep into the soil of God’s marvelous love.

John 16:33 . . . I have told you all this so that you may have peace in me. Here on earth you will have many trials and sorrows. But take heart, because I have overcome the world.

Psalm 86:11 . . . Teach me your ways, O Lord, that I may live according to your truth! Grant me purity of heart, that I may honor you.
Matthew 5:8 . . . God blesses those whose hearts are pure, for they will see God.

(Matthew 6:21 NKJV) "For where your treasure is, there your heart will be also.

(Psalms 143:8 NKJV) Cause me to hear Your loving kindness in the morning, For in You do I trust; Cause me to know the way in which I should walk, For I lift up my soul to You.

(Psalms 62:5-8 NKJV) My soul, wait silently for God alone, For my expectation is from Him. {6} He only is my rock and my salvation; He is my defense; I shall not be moved. {7} In God is my salvation and my glory; The rock of my strength, And my refuge, is in God. {8} Trust in Him at all times, you people; Pour out your heart before Him; God is a refuge for us. Selah

I pray that I in turn have inspired you today and helped fill your cup.

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Pleasant words are as a honeycomb: sweet to the soul and health to the bones. Proverbs 16:24